Tag Leadership

It is impossible to deny that world events impact the workplace, whether it’s a natural disaster, a conflict in a war-torn region, or some other significant cultural event. 

We are in the first weeks, and likely months, of a significant event in the Middle East. 

I am not here to explore the political ramifications, but that doesn’t mean I don’t have my own opinions and feelings about what has happened. And I am indeed horrified by the terrorism and atrocities we’ve seen and heard about. And I am equally horrified by the impacts of war on civilians and the innocents. 

I want to focus on how leaders in the workplace can deal with this. It would be easy to say: ‘Hey, let’s pick a new business issue and move on to normal things.’ 

However, ignoring people’s real feelings about what is happening in the world may seem cold and out of touch. So, as a leader, we need to acknowledge that there’s a humanity element to what is happening in the world. And that the workplace isn’t just where you separate life from your workspace.

Your people look to you for guidance, but you do not want to sound tone-deaf or indulgent. 

You are tone-deaf when you know many of your people are not in a good place, and yet you are ‘forcing’ everyone to behave as if everything was normal and that outside events are not impacting your workplace. You don’t want your people asking: ‘Are you not human?’ 

What does indulgence, in this case, look like? It is going too far in the opposite direction. It’s like endlessly discussing the matter, having all the TVs continually tuned to the non-stop news feeds and driving people into further fear or worry.

So, how do you thoughtfully and respectfully acknowledge what is going on? I would suggest letting people know you can appreciate what is going on by saying something like: 

I know a lot is happening in the world right now, and it’s heavy. 

We are all sad and shocked, and if you need to talk to me about how you’re feeling, please do. 

Let’s all pray and think about all those impacted people. Some of you may know people over there.

Some of you might have historical reasons why you are connected to all this, and I don’t want you to think I’m not concerned about you. 

I hope we can allow our workplace and team to be a place and a time of peace, consolation, and distraction.

But if you need to discuss it, know I’m here.

Stephen Covey says that we all have a circle of influence and a circle of concern. 

Right now, the world is distracted by something far outside of our circle of influence. And, when we allow that to go on, our people get increasingly frightened and feel like they can’t impact anything.

We only impact our circle of influence; in this case, we can influence how we lead our teams by acknowledging the humanity of the work, the people who work there, and what people are experiencing.

There is an art to this; you must understand where your people are to draw the line in the right place.

As a leader and a manager, we have a massive impact on people’s psyche and ability to see things. We must consider what these people need from us today to move forward so they can go home and be with their families.

Ignoring the emotions now would be ridiculous. We must acknowledge that current world events impact our work, and your work is not the most important thing, especially in such moments. It’s hard to put this in perspective, but it gets even worse if you don’t acknowledge it.

Sometimes, just being human is what we need to do, even if we don’t do it perfectly.

Trust your judgment and get advice from those around you to determine the best way to deal.

Because we’re trying to do is give people peace.

When you don’t know what else to do, keep our people in mind and that their hearts sometimes suffer. 

That’s all we can do.

Ultimately, it’s essential to acknowledge all those suffering and for peace in the world.

So many objectives – so many failures

That’s the refrain of leaders everywhere.

The business objectives they need to meet to be successful in their jobs are taking longer than planned, costing more than budgeted or failing outright.

Why do good objectives go bad?

My clients say the ten most common mistakes that cause their good objectives to go wrong – and the coaching solutions I helped them with to solve these costly problems.

Mistake No. 1: Not Assigning the Right Manager. Typically, more time is spent fighting for resources than finding the right person to lead. Too often, managers get picked based on availability, not necessarily skill set. This is a severe mistake as more projects failed because of the wrong manager than could ever be blamed for lack of resources.

Solution: Choose a manager whose skills best match the requirements of your objectives.

Mistake No. 2: Failing to Get Everyone On Board. Too often, objectives fail because they don’t get enough support from those affected by and involved in the project. Usually, the manager:

1. It didn’t make clear what everyone’s role was.
2. It didn’t describe the payoff when the objective was achieved.
3. It didn’t tell how each person’s contributions would be evaluated.
4. Failed to generate a sense of urgency.

Solution: The project manager should start by calling the team together and delivering a presentation about the objective and its importance to the broader organization.

Read More: How to Communicate

Mistake No. 3: Not Getting Executive Buy-in.

Solution: A ship without a captain soon runs aground. Somebody at the higher levels of the organization needs to own the objective and be personally vested in its success.

If the objective isn’t crucial to your boss, ask yourself why it should be meaningful.

Mistake No. 4: Putting Too Many Objectives on the table at One time. Most managers think that they can start and work on every objective at the same time. In reality, multitasking slows people down, hurts quality and, worst of all, the delays caused by multitasking cascade and multiply through the organization as people further down the line wait for others.

Solution: A good first step to stop productivity losses is to reduce the objectives you are working on by 25 percent. Though counter-intuitive, reducing the number of open projects increases completion rates.”

Read more about priorities.

Mistake No. 5: Lack of (Regular) Communication. Communication is the most crucial factor of successful objectives; without regularly communicating, the project will fall apart.”

Solution: Schedule time each week to review progress and stick with it. Regularly scheduled meetings and communications processes help to keep everyone on the same page and work flowing.

Mistake No. 6: Not Being Specific with the Scope of the Objective. Any objective that doesn’t have a clear goal is doomed. Mission creep is one of the most dangerous things that can happen to your project. If not handled properly, it can lead to cost and time overrun.

Solution: Define the scope of your project from the outset and monitor the project by continually asking if our work is contributing to the objective’s success.

Mistake No. 7: Providing Overly Optimistic Timelines. The intentions are noble, but missing deadline after deadline will only lead to distrust and aggravation.

Solution: Add a buffer — some extra time and money to your project.

Mistake No. 8: Not Being Flexible. While you may think of your plan as the bible that leads you to your goal, listen to new information and suggestions that come up along the way.

Solution: Step back and take a fresh look at the overall project, review how things have gone so far, and how you can improve.

Mistake No. 9: Micromanaging Projects. New managers commonly treat their job as an enforcer, policing the team for progress and updates.

Solution: Set expectations from the start that there will be regularly scheduled updates to advise the status and progress expected and encourage them to vocalize any issues.

Read more about micromanagement.

Mistake No. 10: Not Having Defined Success.

Solution: The first thing a manager should do is to ensure what will be considered a successful completion of the objective. Understanding what success looks like ensures everyone walks away satisfied at the end.

It’s impossible to avoid hearing about AI these days.

From those who praise it to those who warn about an impending apocalypse because of it, there is no shortage of opinions or predictions about it.

Instead of discussing AI’s pros and cons or capabilities, I will try something different in this post.

Today I will interview an AI by asking ChatGPT questions about leadership!

What do you think about ChatGPT’s responses?

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There are many schools of thought about the role of a leader. What are the essential qualities of a leader? What are the must-haves?

Well, I have three distinct opinions.

What makes a great leader?

1. A leader taps into their team’s talents to achieve results.
2. A leader’s role is not to engage their team but to achieve their mission by motivating and inspiring their people.
3. A leader does not run a country club; they lead people to achieve something more significant than they could ever achieve as individuals.

The essential qualities of a leader

We also know that each leader should have a mission. Often, there are overlapping qualities between leaders in any industry and for all kinds of teams. For example, their mission is to create a cohesive, effective team in almost every case. Their mission could be to inspire, motivate, and bring out the best in their team.

But one thing is for sure, regardless of the exact details of their mission, there are certain qualities a leader must have to achieve them.

Here are the nine qualities of a leader they must tap into to lead effectively and in line with their goals.

Be Creative

Leaders must be creative and unafraid to take creative risks. Creativity allows competency to move to excellence. It is the spark that captures peoples’ attention and builds a cohesive whole.

Know the Structure

Leaders know and understand the structure of their organization. But they also know when to move beyond the boundaries of these structures. While we all work within parameters and limitations, a great leader knows not to let structure slow the process. Knowing the structure enables you to guide others to work within it effectively.

Use Your Intuition

Intuition is the cornerstone of emotional intelligence. And emotional intelligence is one of the cornerstone qualities of a leader. Use your insight to sense what others are feeling and thinking so you can respond to them with understanding.

(We discuss more why emotional intelligence is critical to becoming a better leader in this post.)

Be Committed

A leader is committed to success. One of the qualities of a leader who leads effectively is that they can articulate that vision to the team. Then, they can also move and inspire the team toward the goal.

Be Human

Employees value humble and selfless leaders who don’t hide behind authority. The best leaders are those who aren’t afraid to be themselves. They respect and connect with others and inspire loyalty.

Be Versatile

Flexibility is the ability to be not overly attached to how things are ‘supposed to be’ and allows you to respond to events that will inevitably come up.

Have Fun

A light touch and a laugh balance out the seriousness of the task at hand and the team’s resolve and contribute to results and retention. When appropriate, levity can go a long way to energize your team members and promote a positive team environment.

Discipline

Discipline is the ability to choose what one pays attention to and consistently model leadership. It’s one of the qualities of a leader that, by demonstrating, they can also inspire in their team.

Focus

Do not take your eye off your objectives … a leader achieves results!

(On the topic of results, take a look at this post next: The Last Thing You Need Is Another Leadership TED Talk: 3 Tactics That Leads To Action & Results)

Develop these qualities of a leader in yourself.

When you read through this list, chances are you mentally checked off some items. Maybe discipline and focus are two of your strong suits as a leader. But chances are, there are also some qualities of a leader you would like to work on developing in yourself. In that case, we should talk. My one-on-one coaching is for new or uncertain leaders who need help finding their way forward. Please read all about how it works here.

Did you like reading about the qualities of a leader?

Here are three posts to read next:

• 14 Secret Habits That Will Make You A More Effective Leader
• 4 Actions To Ensure That Your Leadership Adheres To The ‘First Team’ Model
• Five reasons you need to improve your Leadership Skills

This post was first published in 2017 but was updated in 2021, just for you.

L’esprit de l’escalier:

We have all been there.

You are responding to a job interview question or having a spirited debate.

When it is over, and you walk away, that is when you think of that perfect response.

And I mean perfect, the mother of all answers and proof of your wisdom and powerful intellect.

Except, no one is there to hear you.

The literal translation of L’esprit de l’escalier means “the spirit of the staircase.”

The phrase is attributed to an 18th-century French philosopher who was berated at a party in a Parisian loft.

He left the party and went to the ground floor, where he looked back up the staircase.

And at that moment, he found his wits and came up with the perfect reply.

Letting an audience member down

Recently I spoke at the Certified Human Resources Professionals conference.

The workshop was titled: The HR Professional’s Dilemma: Leading When You Have Full Responsibility, But No Authority.

Read how you can bring this workshop to your team

I have to say it went well. The audience was engaged. I felt great.

Then the last question of the session was asked: “What do you do when no one is supporting the project you are trying to get done.”

I gave an okay answer, but not the best solution.

The conference centre is built into a hill, and there are several long escalators to ride as you move through the building.

When I got to the bottom of one escalator, literally and figuratively, L’esprit de l’escalier hit me.

The response I should have given came to me.

I should have responded with a series of questions:

Who’s project is it?

 Is it your project or the organization’s project?

 Have your peer and leadership teams said the project was vital to achieving the organization’s strategic objectives?

 Because if the project is only your priority and not the whole organization’s, it will be hard to move it forward.

 If everyone is not pulling together towards success, you will be all alone pushing a rope.

Read about asking better questions.

Wasting $20,000

It happened to me.

I dreamed of hosting a high-end conference to promote my organization’s work and establish us as a world-class centre of excellence.

I put into my team and personal performance objectives and got them into the organization’s strategic plan.

Nice Eh?

Sure-fire success!

But it was only my plan.

My peers and boss seemed okay with it and did nothing to stop me from moving this forward.

I made $20K worth of commitments to meeting planners, hotels, and speakers.

And it failed because it wasn’t an organizational objective.

Only mine.

The better answer

If the project you are working on does not help your organization meet its strategic objectives.

If it doesn’t help your boss meet their performance objectives.

If it doesn’t support your peers’ objectives

Then you are undertaking a Sisyphean task or are shouting up the staircase.

Read about Sisyphean tasks

So, ask yourself why you are doing it.

Based on articles by Stav Ziv and  Melody Wilding

Have you ever felt an ominous lump in your throat during a meeting? Maybe you’ve noticed tears forming and then slowly gathering, giving the office a slight blur as you pretend to cough them away.

I have.

When my last job ended, I felt a massive relief as I was very unhappy with what was happening around me. At the same time, emotions were running close to the surface as I loved my work and the people I worked with, and my ego was getting beat up because I felt like I was failing.

I felt my breath catching and prayed no one would look at me, let alone ask me a question, because, at times, I felt the moment I tried to speak, I’d break down.

If you’ve been there, you might also have wondered how to stop crying or how to avoid or delay getting there in the first place.

You’re certainly not alone. A recent survey from the staffing firm Robert Half found that 45% of respondents, all workers in the U.S., had cried in an office environment.

Read about me and being an Ass

Is it okay to cry at work?

The short answer is that it depends—on what kind of situation you’re in when the tears come, how frequently, who’s around when it does, and your work environment.

I come from a military background, where If you cried, you had better have a bone sticking out of you. Most people believe crying can have negative consequences. According to the Robert Half survey, roughly 70% of workers and CFOs agreed that it “can undermine career prospects” or that “crying at work is perceived as weak or immature.”

Only 30% thought that “crying has no negative effect—it shows you’re human.”

There are situations where it’s best not to cry, like when you’re an employee talking to a supervisor (especially if you have a complicated relationship), a woman in a group of men, a presenter standing in front of others in power in a tense situation, or at odds with a colleague.

Read more about wearing your Heart on Your Sleeve

Kimberly D. Elsbach (Ph.D. Stanford University) is a Professor of Management; she adds, “The dangerous part of crying is it repositions us farther down the power position,” Dudley says. “In any situation when we cry, we risk losing our power, credibility, and believability.”

What’s Gender Got to Do With It? Men who cry at work are often judged harshly. Sadly, women who cry may reinforce stereotypical attitudes toward gender in the workplace.

4 Ways to Stop Crying (or at Least Avoid or Delay It)

Depending on the situation, you don’t necessarily have to consider crying at work a career killer.

But here are a few things you can do to tamp down oncoming tears, delay them long enough to find a safe place to let them out or make you less likely to cry in the first place.

1. Take a Deep Breath

A common suggestion for avoiding tears is to practice deep breathing when you feel the waterworks coming on.

Take a Break and Get Away From the Situation

If you think you might start crying and you’re in a setting where you don’t want that to happen, the best thing you can do is remove yourself from the situation. If you’re leading a meeting, you can tell everyone to take a 10-minute break and reconvene. Otherwise, you can quietly step out—people always go to the bathroom.

3. Stop the Thoughts That Are Making You Cry (This’ll Take Some Practice)

If you can’t physically escape the situation, that doesn’t mean you can’t mentally get away. Whatever provokes your crying response, try to put that out of your mind and think about something unrelated instead.

4. Eliminate or Reduce Stressors in Your Life, if You Can

You can avoid crying well before you find yourself in a tear-inducing situation. Ensure you’re getting enough sleep, adequately fed, and hydrated. Try to reduce or eliminate other stressors in your life, too.

The Argument for Not Avoiding Tears at Work

Next time you think about how to stop crying, consider that it might not always be such a terrible thing, and you can help make it just one more normal response in the spectrum of what’s acceptable at work.

And don’t forget that you can play a role when you’re crying and when you notice someone else in the office call. “We can only start changing this if we start to change how we think about it with others,”

So don’t be so hard on yourself if you occasionally feel the tears coming at work.

And don’t be so hard on your colleagues if and when they cry at work.

Crying is a sign of our humanity, and we want to see the society in our colleagues and leaders.”