Archives 2022

I have been coaching a CEO whose company is developing a poor record of delivering products and projects to their customer’s satisfaction.

Click here to learn more about my Coaching packages

It isn’t critical – yet – but in the current market there are lots of competitors who are cutting prices and making big promises. His unhappy customers have options, and although they like my client as a person, friendship isn’t a compelling reason to do business with him.

My client runs a professional project management company and has the PM processes down to a science, yet they are failing their clients … they are failing at stakeholder management.

What happened?

They mapped out who were their stakeholders. They consider matrixes of the influence & power each potential stakeholders had. They developed strategies that were customized to each stakeholder. Nevertheless and despite all of that work … still they fail.

Simply put, they forgot that following proven project methodology does not deliver success; people do.

All of those ‘stakeholders’ are people, and you can’t manage people like little boxes with cute little communications plans. The people who are your stakeholders all have egos, emotions, career aspirations and family problems.

A recent The Harvard Business Review article reported that people account for 80% of the factors that contribute to a project’s failure. Their analysis indicated that the average Project Manager had competency in three times as many “technical” topics as “people” topics.

Think about that for a moment: 80% of the causes of project failure rely on the competencies of your Project Managers are worst at!

Here are six things you need to do to changes those odds:

1. Get to know your Stakeholders – develop a comprehensive understanding of who they are, what they care about, what are their stated and unstated drivers, what they care about and how they relate to your success.

2. Engage your Stakeholders as early as possible – It is a very natural human response … no one wants to be surprised by the change. Egos get fired up when they are excluded until they are expected to get onboard.

3. Listen with both ears open – Listen to what the person is saying and watch for those non-verbal clues. Sometimes they are only telling you what they think you want to hear; sometimes they are nodding in agreement, but their language is saying no-way; etc.

Click here to read about how silence can improve conversations

4. Stop communicating with your stakeholders – talk to them. Communications are the tools but talk with your stakeholders like human beings.

5. Use policies and processes as a carrot and not a stick – doing something because of rules or history is dumb. Work with people to find out what they need out of this project and piggy-backed on that to create win-wins

6. Create communities – Gather people who care that your project succeeds and work to achieve everyone’s success.

 Click here to read about getting the most out of people.

Based on a Harvard Business Review article

Last week I told you about my chance dog-walking encounter with a bright, intelligent HR Professional. We talked about dogs and podcasts and then leadership.

‘Why Are There So Many Bad Bosses?’ Freakonomics podcast

During our time together, she asked my opinion about choosing the best candidate for promotion to a leadership role from a pool of 4 candidates who seem to be more or less equally qualified.

I asked had her company had completed any psychometric testing (DISC, Meyers Briggs etc.)? If all things were equal between the candidates, they should consider empathy and compassion as the deciding factors.

Why Empathy and Compassion?

Empathy is an essential differentiator to good leadership.

The risk is that too much of it can weigh a leader down as they take the people’s difficulties onto themselves.

To manage the impact of the potential burden of empathy by balancing it with compassion. 

Empathy and Compassion: What’s the Difference?

Let’s start with some definitions. The words “empathy” and “compassion,” as well as “sympathy,” are often used interchangeably, and they all represent altruistic traits. But they don’t refer to the same experience.

It is helpful to consider that compassion is understanding what another is feeling and the willingness to alleviate suffering for another.

The following HBR graphic is an excellent representation of pity, sympathy, empathy and compassion:

When we experience pity, we have little willingness to act, and little understanding of another’s experience. We only feel sorry for someone.

When we experience sympathy, there is an increase in our willingness to help and our understanding of the other, and we begin to ‘feel’ for the other person.

When we feel empathy, we have an intimate, visceral understanding of the other person’s experience. We begin to feel with the person, but it does not necessarily help the other person, except for possibly making them feel less lonely in their experience.

Finally, when we have compassion, we understand what the other person is experiencing and are willing to act. Compassion occurs when we ask ourselves what we can do to support the suffering person.

Compassion is an intentional act, not simply an action based on emotion.

What about EQ? Click to read more.

Why Does This Matter?

Empathy often helps us do what’s right, but it sometimes motivates us to do what’s wrong.

As leaders, empathy may cloud our judgment, encourage bias, and make us less effective at making wise decisions. It should not be avoided entirely because a leader without empathy cannot make human connections.

The challenge for most leaders is that we tend to get trapped by our empathy, making us unable to shift to support the person who is suffering effectively.

Avoiding the Empathy Trap — and Leading with Compassion

Shifting away from empathy does not make you less human or less kind. Instead, it makes you better able to support people during difficult times.

Here are six key strategies for being empathetic while leading with compassion.

Take a mental and emotional step away.

To avoid getting caught in an empathetic trap, try to take a mental and emotional step away.

Step out of the emotional space to get a clearer perspective of the situation and the person. Often it is only perspective that you will be able to help.

You are not stepping away from the person; you are stepping away from the problem so you can help solve it.

Ask what they need.

When you ask the simple question “What do you need?” you give the person an opportunity to reflect on what may be needed.

This will better inform you about how you can help and allow the person to feel heard and step toward being helped.

Remember the power of non-action.

Leaders are good at getting stuff done. But when it comes to people, it is essential to remember that people do not need your solutions. They need your ear and your presence.

Read why silence is a HUGE power differential.

Coach the person so they can find their solution.

Leadership is not about solving problems; it is about growing and developing people, so they are empowered to solve their problems.

Coach them, mentor them and show them a pathway to finding their answers.

Practice self-care.

Show self-compassion by practicing authentic self-care.

There is a cost to managing our feelings to manage others better. So we must practice self-care: take breaks, sleep, eat well, cultivate meaningful relationships, and practice mindfulness.

As Leaders, we need to find ways of staying resilient, grounded, and in tune with ourselves.

When we show up in the workplace with empathy and compassion, people can trust us, lean on us and find comfort in our leadership.

A new Gallup analysis finds that 48% of America’s working population is actively job searching or watching for opportunities. The numbers are not as evident here in Canada, but I suspect it is similar and comparable.

Businesses face a staggeringly high quit rate — 3.6 million Americans resigned in May alone — and a record-high number of unfilled positions. And Gallup discovered that workers in all job categories, from customer-facing service roles to highly professional positions, are actively or passively job hunting at roughly the same rate.

Read more about the cost of bad hires.

Employees who are looking for a job or watching for opportunities

People call it the “Great Resignation,” and the Gallup data show that the highest quit rate is among disengaged workers.

Employee resignation and employee engagement

Unfortunately, most employees are disengaged. Gallup’s State of the Global Workplace: 2021 Report identified an employee engagement rate of 20% — 34% in the U.S. and Canada.

• Highly engaged teams are 14% to 18% more productive than low-engagement teams.
• Low engagement teams typically have turnover rates that are 18% to 43% higher than highly engaged teams.
• Replacing existing workers costs one-half to two times the employee’s annual salary.
• Gallup finds that it takes more than a 20% pay raise to lure most employees away from a manager who engages them and next to nothing to poach most disengaged workers.

It certainly seems that the “Great Resignation” is less an industry, role or pay issue than a workplace health & values issue.

Considering that most employees are disengaged, each new hire will likely join a disengaging team.

And that means they will probably leave in short order.

This is a self-defeating cycle, but it can be interrupted.

Interrupted the ‘Great Resignation’ by ‘Rehiring’ your employees.

After two years of the C-word (COVID), now is a great time to rehire your current employees and double down on onboarding new hires.

As leaders, we have a real opportunity to go to our employees and say, ‘Remember when you were first hired? Let’s go back and reinforce the culture and values that attracted you to us in the first place.’

In the case of existing employees, let’s re-onboard them. And I am not talking about the ‘stupid ergonomics/how to sit at your desk’ lecture. Or the ‘Read all of these policies and sign off on them before we tell you where the bathroom is’ session.

Our people are not morons.

They know that despite all of our protestations that we are a family, and our values are the highest in the industry if we focus on rules, policies and procedures, the family & values part is a lie.

They see that what gets oxygen and attention are the Organization’s actual values.

So tell great stories about how you and the Organization live your values.

Populus Group curates a series of culture-related questions and has each new hire call an existing employee each day.

The new hire asks the questions, and the current employee tells a story about their experiences.

Read about the three exercises you can do with your team that will build a healthy culture

Questions like:

• What causes conflict here, what does it look like, and how is it resolved?
• How does the company support me as a family member?
• How are decisions made when there’s disagreement and stakes are high?
• When and how do people like to give and receive feedback?
• Titles aside, who in the Organization has the power to get things done?

It’s time to be vulnerable and tell your existing team that we know we may have lost our way due to COVID. Or we may have done a poor job of onboarding you the first time.

But you want to do better, so we will rehire you.

And we are going to do it better!

In other words, reversing the Great Resignation requires fixing the Great Disengagement — and you and your leaders are critical.

“A company is stronger if bound by love than by fear,” the late Herb Kelleher, co-founder, CEO and Chairman of Southwest Airlines, once said.

I remember very clearly the first time I heard the word “love” uttered in a leadership context. I was about to teach a workshop on leadership to a group of up-and-coming junior officers. Before being introduced, the unit leader told the room full of mostly men they needed to love the people they were responsible for leading.

You could have heard a pin drop. Coming from this soldier’s soldier, the L-word was utterly unexpected.

Is it okay to use the word “love” in the workplace?

The Merriam-Webster Dictionary defines love as “a strong affection for another arising out of kinship or personal ties.” As leaders, we need to understand that we may be the most important person in the lives of the individuals we lead.

I don’t recall ever being told that a Boss loved me, but I can remember, as if it happened yesterday, the times when a boss called me by my first name, told me they were proud of me, protected me from someone who was blaming me for something I didn’t do.

Read about Recognition 

All demonstrations of love. All demonstrations of belonging to something bigger than myself.

This isn’t just my opinion. A considerable amount of evidence suggests that social disconnection is widespread today. CIGNA first reported data in 2018 that chronic loneliness in the US has reached epidemic levels based on its research findings.

Beyond helping people feel safe and belonging, there are several compelling reasons outstanding leaders see the difference love can make in the workplace.

Love inspires performance excellence and resilience. Serving others is a reflection of love. Research shows that love has improved performance and protected people from stress and burnout. Call center staff raising money saw their revenue quintuple after meeting a recipient of that aid in person. Radiologists increased their diagnostic accuracy by 46-percent when the CT scans included facial photos of the patients. The most effective leaders inspire people by connecting them with the people they serve to show them how their work is helping others.

‍Love pulls together. Taking time to get to know and care for the people you lead brings about greater unity, especially as your team faces adversity. When love exists among the team members, they are more likely to pull together than tear one apart. They feel the bond of connection helps them overcome the inevitable obstacles every organization encounters.

Love overlooks minor offences. When love is present in a team, department or organization, people are more likely to assume the best in others and give them the benefit of the doubt. Absent love, potentially offending words or deeds are more likely to bring about retaliation and sprout rivalries that undermine performance.

‍How healthy is Your Organization? Take the test

Relationship Excellence Enhances Task Excellence

Critics say that love makes a work culture too soft. They are concerned that promoting the positive relational side of work will negatively impact productivity or make it harder to hold people to a high standard.

This is quickly addressed by having leaders communicate that being intentional about achieving excellence and results is expected so people don’t lose sight of their importance. And when standards are not met, take action to close the performance gap. This reinforces that, along with love, task excellence and results are essential to serving people well.

What critics miss is that relationship excellence enhances how tasks are performed. People who work in an organization love the people they work with and serve through their occupation. They work harder to please them. They care about the quality of the product or service they provide, and they offer it in a way that reflects love.

Employees of a business that reflects love also interact in loving ways. They are supportive, encouraging, patient, kind, empathetic and caring. 

Gallup Research has shown that the people we work with and how we interact with them are more important to job satisfaction than we do. Engaged workers give more effort in their work, align their behaviour with their company’s goals, communicate and cooperate more, and actively think of ways to innovate. 

Read more about appreciation. 

So, what’s love got to do with it?

Few leaders use the L-word.

So the next time you hear a leader speaking about “love” in terms of how colleagues treat one another and work together, pay close attention.

As it turns out, love is a powerful source of competitive advantage.

In the words of the great philosopher, Tina Turner, what’s love got to do with it?

Everything