You have heard someone saying they needed a coffee.
And really, tired or hungover who amongst us hasn’t felt that they really needed a coffee
In all honesty, we only want that coffee.
We really don’t ‘need’ it.
If you need a coffee you only want it. But if you need a heart transplant, you need a heart transplant.
Most of my perspective coaching clients receive coaching as a “want” not a “need”.
The first question I ask is whether the person looking for coaching is receptive to doing the work related to coaching and that is part of their growth and development.
If I were to ask “are they receptive to HAVING a coach?” the answer gets mired in ego, “my organization is investing in me” or “it will be great to have someone to talk to”.
It is vital that the individual really wants to grow and improve.
The optimal conditions for developmental coaching occur when:
- there’s growth needed (whether it’s to be successful in the current role or to be prepared for a new one),
- the individual knows that growth is needed, and
- the individual is willing to do some work.
To say someone “needs” a coach is to imply that they’re broken, or that they aren’t capable of growing or changing on their own.
My ideal client is in fact totally capable.
Together we can accelerate their process, we can support their development in new competency areas, and we can provide objective feedback based on what we observe.
And when we’ve done all of that – when we’ve achieved the objectives set for our engagement – I leave.
And that is is really why we don’t want the client to “need” us.